Young Cullenstein
by KayCie - 2013ECO
Summary: Edward Cullenstein, grandson of the man who created the monster, has inhareted his grandfather's estae, and has vowed not to follow in his grandfather's "footstochpes". But will events and genes, stop him from keeping that promise?PLEASE READ!
1. Chapter 1

**AN: I got this idea while watching Young Frankenstein. Funniest movie ever. And I've read/ attempted to write stories based on other movies i.e. The Princess Bride, Anastasia, The Sound of Music. I hope you like.**

**THE CAST**

Fredric Frankenstein – Edward

Inga – Bella

Igor – Jasper

Victor Frankenstein – Carlisle

The Monster – Emmett

Frau Blucher – Esme

Elizabeth – Rosalie

Inspector Kemp – Charlie

Baron Von Frankenstein – Aro

Constable Henry – Garrett

Herr Falkstein – Ben Cheney

Mr. Hilltop – Mike Newton

Medical Student – Eric Yoke

Sadistic Jailor – James

Little Girl – Alice

Blind man – Tyler

Genewilder-edwardcullen/peterboyle-emmettcullen/martyfeldman-jasperhale/clorisleachman-esmecullen/terigarr-bellaswan/kennethmars-charlieswan/richardhydn-bencheney

**Ch. 1 = The Baron's Will**

As the man entered the secluded room he felt a sudden chill, despite the glowing fire in the fire place. The room was empty besides a few scattered chairs. The shutters were open letting the light of the full moon flow in. In the middle of the room, a large coffin, occupied most of the space. As he approached, the man could see the name, _Baron Von Cullenstein, _clearly carved into he dark polished wood of the coffin.

When he was about six inches from the coffin the lid opened to reveal the Baron himself. It was truly a gruesome sight. One of the Baron's eyes were wide open, the other was open to a slit. His skin was falling away to reveal the bones beneath. The skin around his mouth was gone, showing all of the Baron's teeth. And there, clutched to the deceased Baron's chest was what this man had traveled all the way here for. The box containing Baron Von Cullenstein's last will and testament.

He had just managed to pull the box almost fro the Baron's grip when it was tugged back to the dead Baron's body. The man tried again, but this time he could only raise the box three inches before it snapped back. The man pried the bony, stone cold hands from the box.

Before he left the room the man saw the Baron's hands curl closed, and the lid of the coffin slam shut just as a bolt of lightning flashed.

Genewilder-edwardcullen/peterboyle-emmettcullen/martyfeldman-jasperhale/clorisleachman-esmecullen/terigarr-bellaswan/kennethmars-charlieswan/richardhydn-bencheney

**AN: I really hop you'll like this story. I just graduated from 8****th**** grade on Friday. It was so sad. All of the girls were crying. High School starts August 11****th****. I'll have more time to write now. PLEASE REVIEW!!!!!!!! And watch the movie Young Frankenstein. I love Gene Wilder as Fredrick Frankenstein ("that's Fronkensteen")**


	2. That's Collensteen

**AN: /**** and here's chapter 2. Please review even if you hate this story and want me to go to hell because of it.**

**Oh and there has been a change in characters changes are in bold**

Fredric Frankenstein – Edward

Inga – Bella

**Igor – Seth **

Victor Frankenstein – Carlisle

The Monster – Emmett

Frau Blucher – Esme

Elizabeth – Rosalie

Inspector Kemp – Charlie

Baron Von Frankenstein – Aro

Constable Henry – Garrett

Herr Falkstein – Ben Cheney

Mr. Hilltop – Mike Newton

Medical Student – Eric Yoke

Sadistic Jailor – James

Little Girl – Alice

Blind man – Tyler

**Hans Delbruk – Jasper **

Genewilder-edwardcullen/peterboyle-emmettcullen/martyfeldman-jasperhale/clorisleachman-esmecullen/terigarr-bellaswan/kennethmars-

**Ch.2 = **That's Collensteen

Epov

"As we look at the base of the brain, which has just been removed from the skull there is not much of the midbrain that can be seen. But, as I demonstrated last week if the under aspects of the temporal lobes are gently pulled apart the upper portion of the stem of the brain can be seen." I said while drawing out and labeling what I was speaking about on the black board. I paused for a few second so everyone could write down what I had previously said. "The so – called brain stem consists of the mid-brain, a rounded protrusion called the pons, and a stalk tapering downward called the medulla oblongata. This passes out of the skull through the foramen magnum, and of course becomes the spinal cord." I finished my make-shift drawing by drawing x's that over lapped to represent the spine. "Does anyone have any questions before we continue?"

"I have one question Dr. Cullenstein." I turned to see who said that. It was Eric Yorkie. _Figures. _He always acts likea smart-alec, and just annoys me to no end.

I turned to keep my calm when I corrected him. "That's Collensteen."

"I beg you pardon?" He asked blinking and looking like he hadn't heard me correctly.

"My last name," I stated clearing things up for him, "It's pronounced Collensteen."

"But aren't you the grandson of the famous Dr. Carlisle Cullenstein," he retorted with that same annoying '_I'm so smart' _look on his face, "who went into graveyards, who dug up freshly buried corpses, then transformed dead components into – "

"Yes! Yes! Yes!" I had to stop him there. I didn't like it when people pronounced my name wrong, and I especially hated when they proceeded to remind me of the things my grandfather did. "We all know what he did. I'd rather be remembered, though, for my own small achievements to science rather than my relationship to a famous crackpot.' I said washing the chalk off my hands. I got a laugh from all the students except Eric. "Now if you don't mind, can we get on with your question?" I asked him changing the subject away from my ancestry.

"Well sir, I don't fully understand the difference between reflexive and voluntary nerve pulses." Eric said.

_Great! Now we're back on track, _I thought. "Excellent, our lab today is a demonstration of just that difference. So let's proceed shall we." I hit the small gong that hung of the lab table. My two assistant came through the side door pulling a table.

"Mr. Newton here, with whom I have never worked, nor given any prior instruction to, has graciously offered his services for this afternoon's demonstration. Mr. Newton could you hop up from this table and stand beside it please." He complied, but instead of hopping he slid/ fell off the table.

"Nice hopping." I said while making a turn around gesture with my hands.

"Now," I said a bit louder so everyone in the room could here me, "Mr. Newton, could you raise your left knee please." He did. "You have just witnessed a voluntary never impulse," I explained to my class,"It starts as a stimulus in the cerebral cortex, passes out of the brain stem and to the particular muscles involved. Mr. Newton you may lower your knee. On the other hand, "I said walking around the table and putting an arm around Mr. Newton's shoulders, "reflexive impulses are mad involuntarily of the will and are carried out by pathways that pass between the peripheral nervous system and the central nervous system. You filthy rotten, yellow son of a bitch!" I said almost kneeing him in the crotch. Mr. Newton covered said area quickly, and my students gasped at what I did.

"We are not aware of these impulses," I said continuing my lecture like I had done nothing rash, "Nor do we intend them to carry out the contraction of our muscles but, as you can see, the work on there own."

"But what if we blocked the nerve impulse," I said stepping away from Mr. Newton and walking back around the table, "by simply applying local pressure. Which can be done with any ordinary metal clamp," I picked up the clamp and showed the class," just at the swelling on the posterior nerve roots." I put the clamp where it went. "For, oh, say four seconds." I said putting my arm back around his shoulders. "Why you mother grabbing bastard!" I said repeating the motion of ramming my knee into Mr. Newton's crotch. He made not move to stop me.

The students gasped again. "As you saw all communication has been shut off." Mr. Newton whimpered and the students laughed.

"In spite of our mechanical magnificence, if it weren't for this continuous stream of motor impulses. We would collapse like a bunch of cauliflower **(yeah I know it's supposed to be broccoli, but it's my twist and cauliflower is pretty much the same as broccoli besides the fact that it is white)**!" I pulled the clamp of Mr. Newton's neck. He groaned, fell, but was caught just in time by the assistants. The students were applauding.

"In conclusion, it should be noted – give him an extra dollar." I said to one of the assistants.

"Extra dollar. Yes, sir."

"– That any more than common injury to the nerve root is always serious." I said taking off my lab coat and handing it to one of the assistants as the other wheeled Mr. Newton out of the room. "Because once a nerve fiber is severed, there is no way in heaven or on earth to regenerate life back into it." I said walking to my chair and sitting down.

"Are there any last questions before we leave?"

"Uh, Dr. Cullen -," said Eric before I cut him off with a _don't say that _look, "Collensteen"

"Yes."

"Isn't it true that Darwin preserved a piece of vermicelli in a glass case, until by some unknown reasons it began to move with a voluntary motion?"

_Here we go again. _"Are you speaking of the worm or the spaghetti?" I asked making a little fun at him.

"The worm, sir."

"Yes, it seems that I did read something like that when I was in collage, but you have to remember that a worm – with very few exceptions – is not a human being."

"But wasn't that the whole foundation of your grandfather's work sir? The reanimation of dead tissue?"

"My grandfather had a very sick mind." I said barley keeping my composure.

"But as a Collensteen, aren't you the least bit curious about it? Doesn't the brining back to life what was at one time dead hold any intrigue for you?" _God does this boy ever let up?_

"You are talking about the nonsensical ravings of a lunatic mind." I said starting to loose it. "Dead is dead."

''But what about the things that have been done with hearts and kidneys?"

"Hearts and kidneys are tinker toys! I'm talking about the central nervous system!" loosing a little more self control.

"But sir – "

"I am a scientist, not a philosopher!" _okay I have officially lost it. _I grabbed a scalpel off the table and shook it, "you have more chance of reanimating this! Than you do a broken nervous system!"

"But what about your grandfather's work sir?"

"My grandfather's work was doo-doo! I am not interested in death! The only thing that concerns me is the preservation of life!" I was talking with my hands and forgot about the scalpel and accidentally stabbed my thigh with it.

_OUCH!!!! _I turned sideways and crossed my left leg over my right knee to hide the scalpel. _Keep your composure Edward; deal with the pain after your students have left. _"Class is…dismissed."

They applauded, gathered their things, and left.


	3. What Have I Gotten Myself Into?

**AN:/ Sorry I haven't updated in sooo long. I finally found the paper that had this chapter written out. Thank you for reading my stories, I really appreciate it.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight (Owned by: Stephanie Meyer) or Young Frankenstein (Owned by: Gene Wilder and Mel brooks)**

**Epov**

Just as the last of the students were leaving, a short man with a thin nose and large glasses, that seemed to be falling off his nose walked up to me. He was carrying a somewhat small box in his hands. He was holding it in a sort of reverence, like a religious man holding a sacred object. "Dr. Cullenstein." he said.

_Here we go again_. "That's Collensteen," I said thorough gritted teeth, as I pulled the scalpel out of my leg. _Boy does that hurt! _"Who are you anyway?" I asked.

"My name is Ben Cheney. I have traveled five-thousand miles, to bring you the will of your great grandfather. Baron Aro von Cullenstein."

*_*

"A hundred thousand dollars?" I asked. Mr. Cheney and myself were walking down the street talking about my inherence from my grandfather.

"At the very least sir. The land alone is worth a small fortune."

"But I can't just drop everything and leave. I have obligations. For heaven's sake I'm getting married in two weeks. What do they expect of me?" While we were walking, Mr. Cheney was telling me all the things that my inheritance contained and that I had to travel to Transylvania to confirm everything.

"But you also have an obligation to the family." He said trying to persuade me. I think he could tell I didn't want to go. I had been changing my mind throughout the whole conversation.

_Decision time, Edward. Make your choice._ "Oh, hang the family. I've made up my mind, I won't do it. And that's that."

"But you could be back in a week's time Doktor. Ten days at the very most."

"Oh, leave me alone won't you." _I made up my mind why does he keep trying to convince me?_ "What you're asking is ludicrous! You know it's not so easy just to pick up and- " While I was talking a man had started playing the violin just a few feet away. The tune he played shut me up instantly. I had this strange feeling in the back of my mind that I had heard that song before, but certainly if I have heard it before I would've remembered it.

"Curious melody. Haunting, isn't it? Of, course I wouldn't want the family to think I am a spoilsport." _what am I saying? I'm not going! Maybe this tune is messing with my brain._

"Does that mean you'll-" Mr. Cheney started to say before I cut him off.

"Excuse me a minute" I walked over the violinist and tapped on his shoulder. "Um sorry, Excuse me, what is that tune you're playing?"

"This is an old Transylvania lullaby."

"It has something. It's such a quaint little tune." The man nodded. "Um, may I see your violin?"

"It would be an honor Sir." He said handing me the instrument, "Do you play the violin?"

"Oh, just a little. I'm more of a piano man myself. "I started weighting the violin in my hands, "Nice, nice little balance to it." I said. Then the weirdest thing happened, the violin broke in two. "Thanks, so much," I said handing it back. I turned back to Mr. Cheney, "Well if you're sure I could take care of everything in a week." I started to pull a cigarette out of my pocket, when something Mr. Cheney said stopped me.

"Why did you do that?" he asked.

"What?" I asked surprised. _What did I do?_

"Break that man's violin."

I turned around and saw the violinist and his violin. _Why is it broken?_ I turned back. "I didn't do that."

"But the violinist, you smashed his violin over your knee."

"I did not do that! Why would I do a thing like that? Are you insane!?" I asked. _How could he say that I broke it_? I walked away from him and lit my cigarette. I barely heard, and tried not to be offended when I heard Mr. Cheney say, "He is a Cullenstein!"

I turned to face him and said, "Well I suppose I owe the family that much." _What have I been smoking? Okay this is my last cigarette! Oh, well. I agreed better stick with it._ "But you're sure everything will be ready when I arrive?"

"Yes. I will take care of everything. You don't know how happy this has made me." I had a guess that it was taking him a lot of effort not to jump for joy.

"One week at the most." I defined

"One week. I will see to it Herr Doktor."

"Alright then, goodnight." I shook his hand and left.

Oh, god what have I gotten myself into? Now I have to tell Rosalie. She won't be happy about this.

**AN:// Thank you to Cristy94, for being my beta. If you want me to continue the story please let me know.**


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